Heal thy self. It is an interesting statement. When our bodies are injured we physically heal. Can the same idea be true about our ability to heal ourselves mentally, emotionally and spiritually?
Many people are not aware that they have the ability to heal themselves in the areas of mental, emotional, spiritual self. Even those that are aware sometimes lack the knowledge, not the ability to change themselves and their lives for the better.
Once common way of trying to heal our wounds is to seek out a relationship.
Good relationships feel great and give us a future to focus on and goals to work towards. Relation ships help us grow, mature and learn things about life that we simply cannot readily do on our own. They are important but relationships cannot heal the deep wounds we sometimes bring into them. Used poorly, relationships complicate our life and distract us from the wounds we need to heal.
We have to start healing the deep wounds on our own by being aware of those wounds and by being willing to DO something about them. Even when those wounds are not self inflicted. The one who hurts us can help us heal but only to a point.
Relationships are nothing more than a band-aide. They can help in the healing, but they cannot heal us by themselves.
So, often, we try to use out relationships to heal our wounds. Wounds that maybe we're there from poor parenting, being bullied at school or from some past traumatic event ,ect.
If we are not aware of our wounds, we may end up feeling insecure, accusing out partner of cheating, crave affection from multiple partners, reliving our traumas in some way or constantly seeking the sense of being right and validated.
Such deep wound and behaviors often destroy relationships. True healing takes place from our awareness of our issues and our willingness to work on them. Sometimes we can do that work in a relationship, other times we do it when we are alone, sitting by ourselves at a coffee shop of in a therapist's office.
If you feel you have healing to do and are not sure how to do it, reach out and contact Serenity.
David Linares, LMHC